‘Jihad’ school’s war on error

By Melissa Grant
A SCHOOL holiday prank has seen Beaconhills College labelled a “racist” co-educational school with a campus in a secret jihad facility in northern Pakistan.
The college’s building plans also included the construction of a “human pleasure centre” and a McDonalds to “replace the overpriced canteen,” according to the Wikipedia website last week.
The derogatory entries to the site first appeared on 15 January, exactly a month after the school recorded that two dozen VCE students achieved scores in the 90s and all 240 students successfully completed their VCE certificate in December 2008.
Beaconhills moved swiftly and removed the vandalism last Friday.
The pranksters – presumably students – wrote that those attending “Baconhills” took a two-year break between prep and Year 12 to take part in “weapons and bombs training” and make “weekly sacrifices to the devil.”
They also warned that the school’s uniform for terms two and three was highly flammable and reminiscent of the Hitler Youth.
“Warning – our uniform is from a sweatshop and is expensive and low quality,” the website had read.
They alleged the idea to establish “Baconhills” – a local independent terrorist group – was conceived by a group of parishioners at St John’s Anglican Church in Upper Beaconsfield in 1980.
They also wrote that the college had plans to continue the development of the school, but needed “a large amount of funds to construct our artistic, but wildly impractical buildings” over the next 50 years.
A torture and imprisonment headquarters and a brothel would be built at the Valley Campus in Pakenham over the next two years, according to www.wikipedia.org last week.
The McDonalds restaurant and human pleasure centre was planned for the school’s Village Campus in Berwick.
The pranksters also wrote that the school’s “out houses” participated in “inter-toilet competitions throughout the year.
Despite several attempts, Beaconhills College headmaster Tony Sheumack could not be contacted before the Gazette went to press.